Well Its been quite a radically changing few months, in fact I do think there's a possibility my personality has re-established itself as owner of my own body!!
I'm still at Costa... I like it.. Now...
I have to admit I initially did not react well to the introduction of a new manager, with my resistance to change still being a firm characteristic of my eating disorder (more of that later)... I am almost a little ashamed to admit that I was rather stubborn with my new manager... I didn't trust him... it was nothing personal... I just didn't trust people at the time in general.
I remained in treatment until last month... Earlier in the year I was referred to a Psychotherapist for additional therapy... well.. what I thought was addititional therapy...
After several sessions with my new therapist Andrew (an odd man whos aim appeared to be to make me break down every week by sitting in silence and making me sit still and talk about my past), I mentioned something I'd learned in CBT. At this point it dawned on me that I was not actually having additional therapy... In fact. my therapists knew nothing of each other..
And in that moment I lost faith in the NHS... I reluctantly agreed to continue with Andrew then go back to Jackie afterwards.... I gave myself to a few futile further sessions with Andrew then didn't go again...
I was actually happy about my decision. I felt ready to move on and I am lucky enough to have support this time around.
This time around.. It will work out...
I've started Pole Fitness... I've been doing it since last October and I'm good... I'm really good at it...
So my blog will be a bit different... Well... a different focus anyway...
... That's it really, for today anyway...
